Divorce can become unpleasant, even if you set out with the best of intentions.
When couples decide to get divorced there’s often an immediate feeling of relief. It may be that you’ve been unhappy for years having grown apart, you’ve realised this is not your soulmate or you may have simply been wrapped up in the moment without considering the future – and obviously there is a different reason for each individual couple.
You may even agree that the split is going to be amicable but that can change very quickly. As soon as talk turns to finances, assets and the children if you have them, things can turn nasty. With these all being very sensitive subjects there could be a fight over every detail to ensure you are not the ‘loser’ from the divorce.
Solicitors often make the situation worse. Their job is to get the best deal for their clients, which rarely makes for an amicable settlement.
In other words, you lose sight of why you wanted to keep things cordial in the first place. An amicable divorce makes life easier for everyone in the short and long-term. No child wants their parents to divorce. But if they’re parents are continually bickering over money and who gets the house, it makes them feel worse. If you keep the relationship friendly, it can ease children’s pain and upset, and helps them adjust to their new life, whoever that’s with. It also reduces the strain on other relatives and helps prevent wider families turning into warring factions.
Amicable splits are not only quicker to arrange but cheaper as well. By keeping solicitors out of the equation you’re likely to save thousands in legal fees. It’ll also help you avoid the possibility of appearing in court, because if you can’t agree on a settlement, a judge may have to make the decision for you.
Who can help?
Recognising why you should keep your divorce amicable is one thing. But achieving it in practice is another. Which is why getting some professional help is often the answer.
Divorce negotiators are trained divorce specialists, not solicitors. They’re neutral, and work with both of you in a relaxed environment to reach an agreement that works for everyone.
Negotiators will help minimise stress, reduce costs and deal with all the legal paperwork that’s involved. So you can both move on with the next phase of your lives.
If you’d like to find out how Divorce Negotiator could help you, get in touch with one of our negotiators now.