The decision to get divorced from your partner is a big one and will change your life and others’ close to you forever. There are various reasons that couples decide to get divorced and the process can be very emotional, but most of all it is personal. Initially the discussion about breaking up will be between you and your partner but eventually family members and friends may be involved too. It is natural to lean on your friends for advice in tough situations but sometimes this can lead to others hearing about your issues and gossip begins to spread. Likewise, breaking news to your children needs time and consideration but could also lead to others finding out about it quickly.
It is important to be strong during the divorce process and not worry about the thoughts of others and society. During this time, you may find out who your true friends are but the main thing is that you look after yourself, knowing what is best for your future happiness. People love juicy gossip and you are likely to be quizzed by everyone about it, even those you have just met. As news about your divorce spreads, it is likely to bounce around your workplace, community or club you attend. You are likely to be asked invasive, intrusive and upsetting questions. You may also be likely to spill your story and tell every little bit but you have a right to privacy. This includes a responsibility to protect your privacy and reputation.
It may be tempting to tell all to someone who shows concern in your circumstances. You might feel better to mention the awful thing your partner did or how they haven’t done much for the children but that should be your business and yours alone. Instead of telling all, it’s best to say something about it all being a challenge but that every day gets better. In conversations where you feel uncomfortable, try turning the table on those asking to ask how they are and what they have been up to. The main focus of your divorce should be about splitting up amicably and having a fair financial settlement.
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