The question of whether my marriage will succeed is something to obviously ask yourself and talk over with your partner, when you feel you are ready to tie the knot. However, many couples should assess their current situation and work things out with their partner to establish if their marriage is still likely to succeed and what has changed. Over a period as little as 4 years, people can change and want different things. There are online compatibility tests you can carry out but if you feel that your marriage is breaking down then it may be time to talk about divorce with your partner.
According to Robert Sapolsky, a neuroscientist from Stanford University: ‘The more subconscious negativity in a newlywed, the larger the decline in marital satisfaction four years later.’ He among other researchers have studied newlyweds’ feelings towards each other in a number of ways. This could be from asking them similar questions and matching the answers their partner gave or showing them positive and negative images to provoke brain reactions. It is interesting to consider what role our brain has played in marriage and in divorce.
In some cases, biological forces can have an impact on our lives, which we may have been unaware of. For example, repeated arguments and bad experiences with your partner could lead to you developing strong negative feelings towards them. It may be the case that you are not fully aware of how negative you are feeling and perhaps you are plodding on with life and putting up with the way things are.
Your subconscious may have built up with negative feelings over the years and this has ultimately led to a decline in your marital satisfaction. The brain and behaviour can lead to all sorts of possibilities and paths but sooner or later in marriage, if you haven’t been happy, your brain should spark you into action. This could be you experiencing a moment of clarity that actually you haven’t been happy for a long time and as a result would like to pursue a divorce. If you felt you were compatible with your partner at the time of getting married, it may be that you have simply not enjoyed life with them since. This is a clear reason to end things with an amicable split.
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