Divorce proceedings are often seen to be played out with the court room as the boxing ring, with each party fighting to be crowned the winner. This can increase tension between the parties and can often bring out their competitive nature, especially if they feel they have already been hurt by the other emotionally during the marriage. Some see the divorce as their chance to shine, whilst coming out better than their ex-partner. This adversarial system can lead to legal professionals cheering on their clients, as every battling comment can lead to an increase in their fees.
The final knockout in this process is when the loser learns that they will be forced to pay the winner’s costs, sometimes with a legal bill of £50,000 or more. The question is why do we do this? Couples obviously want to get a divorce but leaving their important decisions in the hands of a judge can end up in a legal process, which has caused increased animosity and tension between them. This is awkward if they need to stay in touch because of the children.
There is a good alternative for couples seeking divorce, which saves time and money. Each party can see how they can both benefit from the process and has an opportunity to say how having more than an equal share is fairer in their mind. Couples can sit down with Divorce Negotiator in an impartial basis, to discuss arrangements for children and their finances. This leads them to be more likely to reach an outcome that is good for both of them and their children. Once couples have talked it over, they will hear from Divorce Negotiator how a judge will view their arrangement, which is a much more seamless process.
Mr B and Mrs B decided to separate but could not agree on a financial settlement. They have two children, aged 5 and 7 years old. Mr B refused to leave the family home until an agreement had been reached. The atmosphere at home was becoming increasingly difficult and the children were being affected by the tension. Spending time looking over the family assets and liabilities and even the couple’s income and expenditure meant that we were quickly able to work out fair and reasonable options for both parties to consider. They decided together that they would prefer for Mrs B to stay in the family home with the children until the youngest turns 18 when the property would be sold and the proceeds divided.
Divorce negotiators are able to provide guidance on the law, impartiality and assistance throughout the process to ensure that the outcome is one where neither party wins or loses but is best for the family as a whole. Please contact Divorce Negotiator to discuss how we can keep you talking and out of the boxing ring.
For further information or to have a confidential discussion about your situation, please telephone 0845 388 5592 or visit one of our new offices.