For many people, the New Year is a new beginning and a chance to start over. Everyone is familiar with the usual New Year’s resolutions: lose weight, get organised or eat healthy. Setting yourself some goals and sticking to them is the challenge, which can be very rewarding once they are achieved. As the festive season draws to a close, some may be considering the possibility of D-day!
Divorce can obviously be a sad and stressful time but an optimistic person may see it as necessary grief in order to reach a desired goal. Divorce can also mean new opportunity, a happier life and a more peaceful existence. Perhaps you’ve had a turbulent Christmas and your husband or wife has let you down or the end of the year has become the final straw and you want to make a positive change in 2014.
January can be a depressing time anyway, as you pack the tree and decorations away and go back to work. Although, if you have strong feelings about going ahead with a divorce then consider some alternative New Year’s Resolutions to make 2014 different.
1) Talk to your partner about your feelings.
Many people make the mistake of going full steam ahead into divorce without consulting or listening to their partner. Arrange a time to talk through problems and this may lead to it being resolved or a decision to make arrangements for divorce together.
2) Look ahead and think about what you want from your long-term future.
It’s ok to say you are reasonably happy now but deep down you need to ask yourself if you are truly happy and if not what changes need to be made. Don’t decide to stay together for the children’s sake, do it because you both want to.
3) Discuss the divorce with your children.
This is a difficult one but it should be handled as delicately as possible, as children’s behaviour and reaction to the news that their parents are divorcing can be unpredictable. Perhaps you would prefer to personally speak to them or want to both talk to them so they understand what happens next.
4) Live in the present, not in the past.
The important thing about life is to enjoy every moment because it can end any time. We have control over what is happening right now and above all, we should be focused on being happy!
5) Let go of the hate, anger or resentment and focus on working things out amicably.
Try not to dwell on what went wrong or what you could have done differently. This will only bring up negative feelings. Develop a mutual understanding with your partner so that moving on can be much easier to manage.
At Divorce Negotiator you can save time and money if you work things out amicably and come to a mutual agreement. We provide an alternative service and approach to divorce in England and Wales. Rather than pay two solicitors, we assist both parties through the divorce paperwork from initial Petition through to Decree Absolute.
For further information about Divorce Negotiator or to have a confidential discussion about your situation please telephone: 0800 177 7702